How do I get from where I am, to where I want to be?
By the BeAwakeAwareAlive.com team
It is perhaps the most haunting question of the human condition. It is the whisper that wakes you up at 3:00 AM, the nagging feeling that gnaws at you during your daily commute, and the quiet prayer you utter when you look in the mirror.
It is the gap between your current reality and your wildest dreams. It is the distance between who you are and who you know you could be.
We spend a significant portion of our lives feeling stuck in this gap. We look at the summit of our ambitions from the base camp of our current reality, and the climb seems impossible. The path is shrouded in fog, the rocks look treacherous, and we aren't sure if we have the right gear. The paralysis of the journey often outlasts the pain of staying put.
So, how do you actually do it? How do you bridge the chasm between the "here" and the "there"?
The answer is not a straight line, nor is it a magic pill. It is a systematic process of deconstruction, mindset shifting, and intentional action. It is a journey of becoming, not just doing.
Part 1: Map the Territory (Define the "There")
You cannot reach a destination if you don’t know what it looks like. "I want to be successful" or "I want to be happy" are not destinations; they are weather systems. They are vague, intangible, and subject to change.
To get where you want to be, you must first define it with brutal clarity.
This requires moving beyond the abstract. If you want to be "successful," what does that look like on a Tuesday morning? Does it mean you are the CEO of a company? Does it mean you have the freedom to work from a beach in Bali? Does it mean you have a specific amount in your bank account? Does it mean you have written a novel?
Grab a journal and a pen. Write down your ideal life in the present tense. Pretend it is five years from now, and you have everything you want. What does your house look like? What does your day look like? Who is around you? How do you feel? Get specific. This is your North Star. It is not a rigid set of rules that you must follow to the letter, but it is a guiding light that will help you navigate the storms.
Part 2: Accept the Reality (Define the "Here")
This is the part that hurts. We often want to skip this step because it involves admitting that we are not where we want to be. It requires looking in the mirror and being honest about our current habits, our toxic relationships, our lack of discipline, and our financial status.
This is not about self-flagellation. It is about diagnosis. A doctor does not prescribe a cure without knowing the condition of the patient. You cannot fix your life if you are unwilling to acknowledge what is broken.
Take an honest inventory of your life:
Finances: Are you in debt? Do you have an emergency fund?
Health: Are you physically active? Are you eating well? Are you sleeping enough?
Relationships: Are you surrounded by people who lift you up or drag you down?
Skills: What are you good at? What do you need to learn to reach the "there"?
Time: Where does your time go? (Track it for a week. You will be shocked by the amount of "dead time" you have).
The gap between where you are and where you want to be is often made of your habits. The decision to change the gap is made by your mind, but the execution is made by your daily routines.
Part 3: The "S.M.A.R.T" Detour
Once you know where you are and where you want to go, you need a flight plan.
While the 5-year vision is your North Star, you can't navigate by a star alone. You need to get out the map. This is where the old cliché of Goal Setting comes in - specifically, S.M.A.R.T goals.
Specific: "I want to lose weight" is not specific. "I want to lose 20 pounds" is better. "I want to lose 20 pounds by December 1st to fit into my old suit for the Christmas party" is specific.
Measurable: How will you know you are progressing? Is it a number on a scale? A dollar amount in your bank account? A number of pages written? Track your metrics.
Achievable: If you are currently making $50,000 a year, aiming to be a billionaire in 12 months is not a goal; it is a fantasy designed to make you feel bad. Aim for a stretch, but a plausible one.
Relevant: Does this goal actually move you toward your 5-year vision? Or is it a distraction? If your goal is to get a promotion, but your ultimate vision is to start your own business, the promotion might actually be a trap.
Time-bound: Dreams have no deadlines. Goals do. A deadline forces the brain to action.
Break your big goal down into yearly goals, then quarterly, then monthly, then weekly. What do you need to do today to move the needle? If your goal is to write a book, your daily goal is to write 500 words. It doesn't sound like much, but it adds up to 182,500 words a year. That is a novel.
Part 4: The Unseen Obstacle (The Mindset Shift)
Here is the hard truth: You are the architect of your own prison, but you are also the key to your own cage.
Often, the biggest obstacle isn't the market, the economy, or your competition. It is your own limiting beliefs. These are the narratives you tell yourself that keep you small.
"I'm not good enough."
"I'm not smart enough."
"I don't have the right degree."
"People like me don't do that."
To get from here to there, you have to kill those narratives. You must practice self-compassion. You are not a machine that can be programed overnight. You are a human being who has been conditioned over decades. There will be relapses. There will be failures.
You need to cultivate a Growth Mindset - the belief that your abilities are not set in stone but can be developed through dedication and hard work. When you fail, don't say "I am a failure." Say "I failed at this specific task today." The second is a data point; the first is a life sentence.
Part 5: The Action Bias (Moving)
You can have the clearest map in the world, but if you don't start walking, you will never reach the destination.
This is the point where most people get stuck. They wait for the "perfect moment" or for the fear to disappear. The fear never disappears. Courage is not the absence of fear; it is the willingness to act in spite of it.
Start moving.
As the Harvard psychologist Jerome Bruner once said (aligned with the spirit of Seneca), "He who suffers before it is necessary, suffers more than is necessary."
Stop suffering in your head about the difficulty of the journey. The first step is almost always the hardest. Gravity seems to weigh you down. But once you take the first step, momentum takes over.
If you want to start a business, make the first phone call. If you want to be a painter, buy the canvas today. If you want to be fit, put on your shoes and go for a walk. The action creates motivation, not the other way around.
Part 6: The Journey vs. The Destination
Finally, you must learn to love the process.
When you finally arrive at the "there," you might look back and realize that you have changed so much that the "there" looks different than you imagined. The person who set out on the journey is not the person who arrives.
If you are only focused on the destination, you will hate every step of the way. The 20 pounds you want to lose, the 365 days of writing, the grueling hours of study - if you hate them, you will quit.
You have to become the kind of person who enjoys the discipline. You have to find joy in the daily grind. You have to appreciate the growth that happens in the struggle. The "getting there" is actually the "there." The destination is just a milestone on an infinite journey of becoming.
The Final Step
Getting from where you are to where you want to be is a decision.
It is a decision to stop making excuses and start making progress. It is a decision to treat yourself with the compassion of a mentor and the discipline of a general. It is a decision to look at the mountain, not just at the summit, but at the rock in front of you, and choose to place your foot on it.
Stop waiting for the "right time." The right time was yesterday. The next best time is now. Start small. Be consistent. Be kind to yourself. And keep moving forward. The distance between where you are and where you want to be is measured not in miles, but in decisions. Make the right one today.
With thanks to Ann H at pexels.com for the great image
Don’t forget to sign up to our mailing list, follow our social channels, donate if you’re able, and question everything, with more free blogs, and life-changing books at BeAwakeAwareAlive.com
